People Who Need People
From the introvert to the extrovert, we all need people. We were wired to relate to others, it is in our DNA. We have multiple transient relationships in a lifetime. How we handle these relationships is our individual responsibility. Over time relationships change, the ebb and flow of life creates new opportunities for people who need people. We are to love even from afar.
An innie or an outie?
Introverts are not generally understood to need people in their lives. However, they tend to have deep relationships with a few people rather than cursory relationships with a large number of people. Yet they need people. Extraverts are generally seen to be people that are immensely social, open to numerous casual relationships. However, they have deep relationships with people too. They need people.
We often shift from introvert to extravert in various situations. Therefore regardless of the category we occupy at any time we all are people who need people.
People are in our lives for a season. Sometimes we share a job, kids are on the same soccer team, we share a passion or hobby, we worship at the same church or met at a conference. These are all reasons why people connect.
There are some that remain a part of our life from childhood. I have one friend since elementary school that I have kept in contact with over these many years. I have another that I knew as a young girl and we recently reconnected. Both women held pivotal roles in my life. I value them both and appreciate that we still have a connection. What a blessing they both have been. Today we live in different states and time zones, nevertheless the bond remains.
New Season
Not long ago, after a very lengthy hiatus, someone I formerly talked with almost every day, reconnected. There was an attempt to pick up where we left off decades ago. However, that season of our relationship has passed.
Indeed it is a reality of life. To everything there is a season. Our children are grown and out of the nest. The days of work consuming virtually our entire existence are well behind us. Today we explore new paths and interests. I am thankful for her giving, caring, nature. I appreciate her desire and ability for hospitality, nonetheless this is a new season for both of us. We cannot go back to the same relationship we had then. This is a different season.
It does not mean there is any love lost in my heart for her. I love her as God has commanded us, with unconditional love. Plus I truly like her. I relish being in her presence. I miss her and it is my prayer that she understands my heart. I think she does, but I am not certain. I have given her space to be herself; no judgments.
Just this week a woman mentioned how she missed others, who for reasons unknown to her, were no longer in communication with her. I have experienced this type of situation before. What I have learned to do is love them from afar. After praying and searching myself to reveal if there is anything I need to do.
God is ultimately in control. I know to everything there is a season.
We are unable to control people. Created in the image of our creator we were given dominion over things, not people. We are able to control our thoughts, our feelings, our actions, our behaviors and our habits. Focusing on what we can and are responsible to do allows us to operate in strength, which yields our best life.
No Judgments
Loving yourself includes operating in strength. I am loving myself by releasing myself from the bondage of unrealistic expectations of others. Seasons change. It is my expectation that people will make mindful adjustments, when necessary with God’s guidance. As I make those adjustments in my life I pray that others will have the same expectation of me.
Loving my neighbor as myself allows me to honor the right and responsibility of people to make choices. As we all have the opportunity to seek God and His way of doing and being right, He sovereignly reigns, over people who need people.
Love,
Deborah
“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”