Gratitude is a component of love. It benefits the one that gives as well as the one that receives. All aspects of love are beneficial. The positive outcomes of gratitude flow from the giver to the receiver, like a current that travels through a simple electrical circuit. Throughout the Bible four types of love are defined. Those four categories of love are: agape, eros, philio and storge (for a detailed breakdown of these loves,  get a copy of my book, What do they think we are Peanuts or something?) Every type of love thrives in an environment where its expression is reciprocated. Mature love succeeds even when it is unrequited. Gratitude, like love, is a gift that keeps giving even if it may not always be accepted.

No Instruction Required

We know how to get right from the start. As we enter this world we are self-centered little bundles, focused on how we can get our needs met. No formal instruction is required. Our comfort, food, and shelter all depend on someone else. While cradled in utero we were cared for once we emerged from the womb; kicking, screaming or crying were a frequent mode of communication utilized. Clearly on occasion, we were not sure what our needs involved, nor were we aware what had created the lack however, we would call upon caregivers to have a remedy. We arrive on the planet with the ability to make it known we want to get something, without regard for what it takes to fulfill our need.

In time we come to a greater understanding; we are not the center of the universe. That understanding may not manifest in tandem with any precise chronological age.  Some appear to be aware of this truth before they can speak, while others project an impression they are to be catered to incessantly. They are well entrenched in their existence of selfishness, untouched by the inclination to give any part of themselves to others. These individuals are generally identified with annoying habits that are all about self-gratification. When we encounter individuals with this type of motivation it appears they lack genuine understanding of what is truly important in life.

What is the underlining purpose of living a life solely focused on what one can get? Indeed, a virtuous life includes outward expressions of good will, with the intention of adding to the happiness of others through a proper sense of duty. As you manifest God’s purpose in our lives the growth of love and its components are stirred. Gratitude is a gift that keeps giving.

Gratitude Requires Practice

Just as we each have our own strengths and abilities, giving and receiving love is one of those, we can choose to honor said gifting or not. It nonetheless remains a gift that keeps giving.

The ability to be grateful is a quality of love we all possess. In fact, it is part of our purpose for being. Giving does not “come naturally” to us. We have the freedom to choose our actions. God gave us freewill.  The ability to exercise our freewill is one indicator that we are more than androids. While we can choose our behaviors, we cannot always see (nor choose) the consequences which accompany our choices.

Freewill allows us to live lives void of gratitude. To be in an attitude of gratitude it takes effort. We are directed in the Bible to give thanks in everything, for that is the will of God. When we align our will with the will of God we are said to abide in Him. As we abide in Him, He abides in us. It is when He abides in us that we become His disciples. As His disciples we follow His commandment to love one another. (John 15:1-17) We must practice love. We must practice gratitude. It is a choice. We can choose a gift that keeps giving the love God commands us to give.

What Does Scientific Research Show?

According to Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., said to be the world’s leading scientific expert on gratitude, in his article, “What gets in the way of Gratitude?” there is a connection between humility and gratitude. Through research he finds that, “People who are ungrateful tend to be characterized by an excessive sense of self-importance, arrogance, vanity, and an unquenchable need for admiration and approval. Narcissists reject the ties that bind people into relationships of reciprocity. They expect special favors and feel no need to pay back or pay forward.”

Research also shows the benefits of showing gratitude. Here is a list of seven benefits attained from showing gratitude as noted by Amy Morin, in Forbes Magazine:

1. Gratitude opens the door to more relationships.
2. Gratitude improves physical health.
3. Gratitude improves psychological health.
4. Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression.
5. Grateful people sleep better.
6. Gratitude improves self-esteem.
7. Gratitude increases mental strength.

Give it as Often as You Can

Which of these attributes could you use more of in your life? Gratitude is a gift that keeps giving! Those gifts nurture us and others. To improve your quality of life, give it as often as you can. Although it is your choice.

There is a song that stirred me into a posture of gratitude the first time I heard it. I had gone to visit my cousin Iris. She shared the song with me. That day I was so moved that she gave me her only copy of the song. Every time I hear the song it stirs me to show gratitude.  I am grateful to Iris for sharing it with me!

I hope that you were stirred to be grateful. As you listened what came to mind for you? Who or what were you reminded of that you can give gratitude for? Reach out, give thanks, show your gratitude. It is part of love, the gift that keeps giving!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

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